KNOCK, KNOCKING ON HEAVEN’S DOOR
"Knock and it will be answered"
On a full moon we decided to go to the mountains, be "seekers" taking nothing, eat nothing and hopefully practise our new "skill" of meditation- think no thing.
Well, honestly, we did take essentials with us - our best "heads"
The train ride was filled with discussions on the different Masters we'd recently seen, and then even turned to Jesus.
Under the full moon energy that seemed to drip with promise and answers, I found a comfortable bit of earth sheltered by a tall beautiful tree that seemed to radiate wisdom, and settled in.
My loose version of the 'lotus position', crossed legs and straight back, soon morphed into a more relaxed version leaning back against my friendly tree.
I had read in various books etc that often the first question a seeker asks is the timeless , "Who am I"?
Into the mix I added 'What am I , "What / who is God", “Who was Jesus", and what did he offer me now, two thousand years after his death?”
The questions kept rolling and rattling around my head, but got slower and slower drawing to the center where they actually came to a stop, and it was like my mind became a blank piece of paper.
Suddenly the answers started being "written" on it, and flooding in...
As if a cosmic pen had begun to write upon it, answers began to flow in.
"Jesus is the way, the vehicle, the direct connection to the Divine /God"
Suddenly, completely awake, a radiant energy seemed to permeate every cell of my being as "answers" streamed in rapid succession.
"and God is the source...
the source of creation
the source of pure love...
... the source of pure consciousness...
the energy and the intelligence behind all
that exists in the Universe."
This 'peaked' in a profound realization – the answer to "Who am I?" -we are created in God's image..
The same energy that created the Universe had created me and was within me"
In that moment of profound realization my 'personal identity 'dissolved.' I felt as if my energy, my consciousness, my 'I-ness'merged seamlessly with the creative energy that extended infinitely beyond my individual, limited perception of self.
I felt inseparable from the 'source' and experienced an overwhelming immersion in this state, it was not just a thought, it was a complete experience ,a flood of unconditional love surged, a love directed towards this all pervasive consciousness that seemed to weave the fabric of the universe itself.
A sense bliss, a state so much more intense than any I had previously encountered filled every cell of my body.
The realisation was that I had unconsciously separated myself from the 'creative source' within me' by identifying with a constructed self-image, I had unwittingly created an identity - a personality and way of thinking created from my parents' ideals, my teachers' perspectives, the myriad opinions both good and bad of others of me, and my own desires and self doubts.
But beyond that persona, lay the pure consciousness I had at birth, unburdened by preconceptions, boundless and free. In the midst of those mountains, under the nurturing gaze of the moon, I grasped the profound truth – that I was an intricate thread woven into the fabric of existence itself.
'I' emerged feeling inseparable from this divine creative force, the Nature of which was bliss Previously identifying as a distinct separate individual, this epiphany now unveiled the 'interconnectedness, the oneness' that had always been.
I decided that I wasn’t really ready for advertising.
I’d turned on, I’d tuned into "something" and now I was going to drop out!